Convo with My 13-Year-Old Daughter

Convo with My 13-Year-Old Daughter

The other day, I was fortunate enough to get some valuable time on my oldest daughter’s precious social calendar.  For those who have had a 13-year-old daughter before, I have the utmost respect, and for those who haven’t, you don’t know what you are missing 😊!

Solo Time With Kids

In any event, I do my best as a father to try to have some special time with each of my kids.  I’m far from perfect at it, but hey, what can you do?  That said, I was enjoying a lovely meal at Antica Italian restaurant the other night and trying to get deep in conversation with my daughter.  I asked her about school, her volleyball, her friends, boys (cough cough), and, of course, her thoughts on what she wants to do when she grows up.

It was an enlightening conversation, but the part most relevant for you all (assuming you don’t want to hear about 8th-grade boy drama) is when we discussed her future.  She told me she thinks maybe she wants to be an orthodontist, as they make a lot of money and don’t have to work after hours.  I got a chuckle out of this naturally, as I have lots of dentistry friends and clients. 

I then asked her, Does she like science or medicine?  She responded with not really, think you can see where this conversation is going.  So, naturally, as a father, I saw this as an opportunity to go on a little soliloquy.  Here is what I told her, as I think it holds true for your children, and quite frankly, all of us.

I said, “Aviva, I get that being successful is important to you, and I can’t begrudge that.  However, there are a million jobs out there that can lead to financial freedom.  You must remember you are going to be working in your chosen field for 40 years or so, and thus it is critical that you follow your passion.  The key is to follow your calling and what you think you would most enjoy doing or feel satisfaction in accomplishing professionally.  From there, we can work on how to make it a financially viable career for you.”

Doing What You Love

Now, I was balancing talking to my daughter as well, a 13-year-old naïve young lady, and quite frankly, a client.  The truth is, I believe fullheartedly that the most successful people follow a passion or a calling, and the financial windfall comes later.  Those who chase success are often the most disappointed and are always chasing, leaving them unsatisfied. 

In my career, I have the unique vantage point of seeing both what people do for a living, what they enjoy, and the financial remuneration involved.  I’ve seen liquor salesmen make a million dollars a year and doctors make $150,000 a year.  I’ve also seen liquor salesmen make $80,000 a year and doctors make millions a year. 

You see, any vocation can be financially rewarding if that is important to you (or your 13-year-old daughter).  However, not every profession is going to give you energy and play into your strengths.  The fact of the matter is, when you get energy and enjoy what you do, you tend to excel at it at the highest level.  When you excel at things at the highest level, you tend to make a good amount of money doing these things. 

Look at a professional athlete vs. a weekend warrior, for instance.  One makes an ungodly amount of money, while the other is lucky if they get through the weekend with both ACLs intact. 

When You Follow Your Passion

The dogma of following your passion and what gives you energy, in my experience, leads to the most successful financially and most rewarding lives.  These people dedicate more time to this profession when using this as their north star and hence excel at the highest level.

I enjoyed my date night with my daughter more than she knows.  She is a special person, and I find getting a no-cell-phone (the horror) one-on-one time with any of my kids is the most special time I have.  If you are wondering if the meal was great, we split a Caesar salad, she got pasta, and I got a delicious chicken dish.  We skipped dessert, and I did get the dirt on all the 8th-grade girl drama (holy moly). 

As always, thanks for reading, and stay wealthy, healthy, and happy.